First off, when I say “long Hermes bag,” I’m immediately thinkin’ about the Long Wallet Clutches. Baghunter’s all over those, apparently, boastin’ about their “pristine and pre-loved” collection. Pristine, schmistine, give me a pre-loved one with a story! You know, something with a little character. Like, maybe a tiny, barely-there scratch from a night of dancing, or a smudge from a rogue lipstick. Adds a certain *je ne sais quoi*, don’t you think?
But seriously, these things are pricey. We’re talkin’ artisan-crafted, one-artisan-per-bag kinda deal. That’s dedication! Top-notch materials, blah blah blah, exotic skins… which, honestly, I’m a little conflicted about. On one hand, they’re gorgeous. On the other hand, are we, like, really needing to flaunt endangered lizard skin? Just a thought.
Then there’s the whole “Constance” thing. Okay, the description mentions a rectangular flap-top bag with a spring-loaded H buckle. Sounds fancy, right? And the adjustable strap that can be worn cross…? Hold up. Is *that* considered a “long” bag? I guess if you stretch it out far enough? I dunno. Maybe I’m thinkin’ of something different. Maybe I’m just easily confused.
And then they mention these Hermes artisans, buffing and polishing for *years*? YEARS, I tell you! It’s insane. You gotta respect that level of dedication. Makes you almost want to buy one…almost. My bank account is quietly weeping in the corner.
I also just saw them mention “Hermès Kelly Cut, Kelly Pochette, and Jige Clutch.” Those are also, like, totally Hermes bags. The problem is, the writing is so all over the place, I am not sure where they fit in the “long bag” narrative.
